glass is half empty... nope MY glass is half FULL

is the Glass half emtpy.....



Lower Back hurts/aches


Don’t like to sit in my office chair


Lack of motivation


Likes to sleep, but it’s too much


Can’t wake up to an alarm no matter how much I try


Took an evening nap then went to bed


Darby needs her walks but I’m not taking her


Broke/poor/NO money


Big rewards seem too far away


Don’t want to grocery shop cause it costs money


Can’t just enter any race (no money)


Most of my closet doesn’t fit


I belong to a gym but don’t go very often


I got braces put back on


Let’s change this –


The Glass is Half Full!

 I’m healthy


I have an amazing best friend


I have a lot of wonderful friends that support me


I have a great job, great boss and great co-workers


I’m over half way to getting my Architecture License


I have a roof over my head


My dog battled cancer and won – thanks Summit Vets!


My dog smiles or winks at me every day


My dad, brother, sister and extended family love me


I am able to turn lemons into lemonade


My jeans still fit


I rode a Harley on the 4th of July


I found an amazing therapist


My physician knows how to help me


I found a trainer at the gym who pushes me


I live in the beautiful Pacific Northwest were the weather is just right


Dash Point State park is right out my door and a great place to walk the dog


I found an amazing Weight Watchers Leader.


I’m going on a walk at lunch today in the sunshine (I have my sunscreen on)


I have a running club that always welcomes me back.


I have more running shoes than regular shoes


My apartment is mine, all mine (well, technically Darby-dog’s too)


I’m fixing my teeth/bite with braces and they were free (thanks Drs. Molen)


My finger nails are long (thanks to the braces)


I’m a cool Auntie to my nieces and nephew and tons of other kiddos!


I called a Real Estate Agent today to see if I can get a house (condo, someplace of my own).

slow and steady ramblings...

I’ve been missing lately – this blog helps me, so I’m coming back. Slow and steady is still the name and still the pace… I’m running but I’m having trouble just getting through the days so I need to write it down and start turning this ship around to the pretty blue waters! I read this website Marc and Angel and I’ve borrow some of their comments from today’s post titled ’10 Things to Tell Yourself Today’. After reading these you may come to understand where I’m at right now…



I am fighting hard for the things I want most. – The longer you have to wait for something, the more you will appreciate it when it finally arrives. The harder you have to fight for something, the more it will be worth to you once you achieve it. And the more pain you have to endure on your journey, the sweeter the arrival at your destination. Most great things don’t come easy, but they are worth waiting for and fighting for.

I am letting go of yesterday’s stress. – Sometimes the reason it’s so hard for us to be happy is simply because we refuse to let go of the things that make us upset. As the sun sets on this day, let it go. Leave behind the stress, the drama and the worries. Lay this day to rest. Tomorrow is about hope, new possibilities, and the opportunity to make a better day.


There is enough time today to do something I love. – Where did you leave your happiness? With an old lover? In city you once lived in? In a story you never finished writing? In a dream you gave up on? In a hope you got too weary to carry? Wherever you left it, go back and retrieve it. If you don’t remember where you left it, dedicate a little time today to doing something you love to do, and you will find your happiness somewhere nearby.


It’s not too late. – No matter who you are, no matter what you did, no matter where you’ve come from, you can always change and become a better version of yourself. Peace, strength and direction will come to you when you manage to tune out the noisy judgments of others, in an effort to better hear the soft and steady hum of your own inner strength. And once you hear it, you will realize that it’s not too late to be what you might have been.


From Marc and Angel – their website has brought me a lot of hope and insight… I just wish I could actually hear, use and be what I read sometimes…


http://www.marcandangel.com/2012/07/06/10-things-to-tell-yourself-today/

I'm coming back......

I'm getting ready to come back to my blog. I am still out here and making a go at my life, slow and steady.

There have been a lot of changes in my life lately so I think a complete re-vamp of the blog and a NEW 'About me' section will be in order.

Until I get to the launch I've attached a photo that says it all right now.

Keep on moving, slow and steady!
Jessica

Test post (and a really good day)

I'm testing my new iPhone app so that I can blog more often (and while I'm out and about).

Just a note about my good day, this morning I ran with my best friends, I appeared as an assistant Coach at the Team in Training Preview party, took a little nap and babysat my friends sleeping boys while they welcomed their new niece into the world - today was a good day!

More to come from Jessica, Slow and steady!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

why ? ?

WHY ????
1. Why do I sabotage myself?
2. Why do I deliberately make bad choices when no one is looking?
3. Why have I not run the month of December?
4. Why am I overwhelmed at work?
5. Why do I not designate time to study for my next test?
6. Why am I tired?
7. Why do my pants seem to keep shrinking?
8. Why can I not make my lunch?
9. Why do I go to be late and make getting up harder?
10. Why are my eyes blurry until 10am?
11. Why am I not more excited to be coaching Team in Training in January?
12. Why haven’t I registered for a race?
13. Why haven’t I ran a race since October 24th?
14. Why did I load the new iphone software and fail to run a backup and now have a blank phone (with new software)?
15. Why can’t I have a clean garage or shed?

Why…..

I know the answers (I think) but implementing them is hard…. I need to take control of my life, make small changes and they will lead me to what I am looking for – a happiness, a balance, a ‘I feel good’ feeling….

So here are some of my answers to my own questions above;
1. Self sabotage - because I’m sad, because I’m not in control

2. Deliberate bad choices - because I want the control, whether or not it is bad for me, no one can tell me what to do (I’m stubborn), and by no one seeing it, no one can judge it.

3. Lack of running - I don’t have any running mojo, maybe I was burnt out, and maybe my body needed some rest… I would like a stead fast running partner that I can talk to while running and that can encourage me to get out and move. I have lots of running friends, time to call in some favors…

4. Work - I feel overwhelmed at work because I am, I have a lot of work on my desk and all of my projects are in the same stage – so of course everyone needs everything right away. I need to delegate and prioritize the work, tell some people that it might be a day until their answer so that I can get one task complete, otherwise I’m a daily pinball machine.

5. Study time - I don’t designate time to study because I feel like I’m taking time away from my husband, by dog, my running (in the end I’m not getting studying, family time or running in…. Set aside some study time, maybe after a walk with the dog or at coffee with family.

6. Tired - I need to go to bed and sleep, not be restless (but sometimes I’m tired, but not really tired – restless mind, restless legs, but still tired), maybe running will make me physically tired so that I fall asleep faster. Bedtimes might need to be reinstated.

7. Small pants – duh, butt getting bigger and pants are the same size…. This one is a no-brainer.

8. Lunch – if I can’t find anything in the cupboard or fridge I just give up, if I would organize my groceries specific to my lunch would it make it easier? If so then DO IT!

9. Late to bed – see #6 answer – Bedtimes need to be reinstated! Brian needs a book light so I can sleep if he has his reading light on.

10. Blurry Eyes – See #6, #9 answers above – early morning workouts helped during the summer, I was able to spend blurry eye time working out and by the time I got to work I was invigorated (and not noticeable tired from working out).

11. TnT Coach – I should be totally jazzed to be a TnT Coach, our first practice is in January and we have a few info meetings before then. Maybe I’m not excited because I don’t feel worthy since I haven’t been running and my running clothes got smaller (see #7 above).

12. Upcoming races – why haven’t I registered for a race, dangle that carrot out there….. Barb from the Y-Run-Club mentioned running the Mercer Island Half Marathon in March, maybe I need to commit to that….

13. Race since October – the two races in October where really, really wet (I wore a poncho for the first and second time). That and Elinor has been concentrating on her family after dedicating so much time to her marathon training that I feel like I lost my best running partner. No excuse, I am a marathon maniac, get out there and run!

14. iphone – I am trying to be more tech savvy, but this one got me – I uploaded the new software and lost all of my contacts, photos, notes, layouts, everything. Still in the ‘no-way’ and ‘really?’ stage… still working to see if I can get the info back.

15. Garage/shed – I think this is everyone’s dream, but really, more crap keeps inching its way into the house and not enough is leaving. Does the New Year spur this need for clearing out in everyone? Make a donation box, a dump box and a sell on craigslist box and spend a few hours in there and get something done.

Slow and steady, working toward the positive goals with the answers that I have, that is all that I can do.... no resolutions here.... just life changing goals.

stepping away from the edge

ok, wow, can I go off on a torment or what? I guess I was near the edge last week...

I have taken that deep breath, redirected my thoughts and moved away from the edge. This past week I was on plan for eating and I was able to get six days of workouts in. My eating was not perfect, but I did stay within my Weight Watchers daily points and tried to incorporate more fruits and vegtables into my daily meals. Some days I got in amazing workouts (last nights spin class was amazing), some days I got in a 3 mile run, but I got myself out there six out of the seven days for some bit of real activity and it was really, really nice. Today after my speed workout on Ruston Way with Team in Training Coach Matt I weighed in at WW and was down one pound. I wanted it to be more, but hey, I was down a pound, better than up right? Nice photo of one pound of fat that I added - ok one pound is awesome, so much better than on my rear-end!!!!

So now here is what I am happy for (in bullet form - I have to sleep sometime...

• I ran at Chambers Bay with my best friend Elinor and Monica in the rain and it was fun!


• I will get fully paid for health care from my work next month (right now I have health care, but it is through hubby and his state job and with the way budget cuts are going I was getting a little scared).


• I get to run the North Olympic Discovery Marathon with Monica and Sydnee on Sunday and I can't wait!


• I lost one pound!!!


• I got in a lot of study time during the rainy weekend and I'm finding ways to incorporate it into my busy weekdays.


• I get to cheer on my Team in Training mentees on Saturday - they are doing their longest run - 2.5 hours for the half-marathoners and 4.5 hours for the full marathoners! I'll run some with them, but I'll be trying not to push it the day before a marathon.


• Getting back to blogging - I missed being able to have an outlet for all of this 'stuff' whirrling around in my head!


• Running speed intervals on June 2nd - National Running Day - how could I miss running on this day =)

I hope everyone has a great week and I'll try to get better photos for next week. I CAN do this, I CAN push harder, I CAN run farther, I CAN do this, I WILL!

help I'm floundering

help, I'm floundering in a weight gain hell.... someone, somewhere tell me I can do this! I'm letting everything eat away at me, everything in turn is getting eaten.... then I think how far I have to run to burn off that scone - then I just have a cookie at lunch and pass off the run to another day... erggg, aggggg, grrrrr - the cycle then repeats.....

I'm running the North Olympic Discovery Marathon on June 6th with a bunch of gal pals from the y-run club - to say I'm excited is not enough. I just need to get there.

I made it through a rough year, why am I screwing it up now?

Elinor has started running - I ran with her on Sunday, she is going great - and to think little Mr. is only 2 months old. Crap, if she can do it then why can't I?

I finished my outside project at work and I even signed up for my first architecture test - but I need something bigger! What about a trail marathon? What about a vacation? What about the bathroom painted a different color? See what I mean, I'm floundering!!!!!

off to watch the biggest loser - hopefully it will encourage me and not depress me......